Communication is

 

If there is one thing that gets my blood boiling, it's bad communication. As a kid, strangers, friends family member - whoever! - would come up to talk to me and ask me the typical "kid" questions: "what's your favorite subject in school?", "what do you like most about piano lessons and tap class?", "what did you do on your vacation to London?" My mom, who was usually by my side, never once opened up her mouth to answer for me, but instead, I answered the question... and then some! The Asker would be astounded that the little voice that came out of the curly top head of a kid could produce so much detail and expression. As a little girl, I was quite articulate and enjoyed carrying conversations with all types of people.

This skill grew with me through school (the teachers were wowed) and into my social life (my friends appreciate my detailed updates) and I must say, I am pretty proud of how I express myself through conversation and written word. I am not a perfect person, though. My math skills are non existent and my interest in the sciences lacks. The expressions I share in my communication can sometimes seem a little emotional or dramatic. But at the end of the day, I am glad I can communicate needs, love, disappointment, happiness and all sorts of expressions because without good communication, I believe people would find it very hard to know the real me.

Being a good communicator with all types of people doesn't necessarily mean, though, that the points and expressions get recognized. I've learned that no matter how good I am at communicating, it's up to the recipient to absorb the message. And, as good as I am at communicating, I've learned that I'm not so good at comprehending how people can not absorb the message.

I believe that communication is a two-way street and that there must be a desire for all parties involved to form a partnership to understand each other. They must both take the time and make the effort to do that understanding or the communication is only as strong as the weakest party member. One skill set does not trump what lacks. In fact, it's the other way around.

This discovery is extremely frustrating for someone like me who goes the extra mile to make sure that those I communicate with are on board and understanding. This shouldn't be confused with agreement. My goal is not to ensure that those with which I exchange words drink from my Kool-Aid. I am not looking to change minds and sway people to my side of an opinion. It is just my hope that people listen, consider, and form a response. No response from the other party is the sign of a communication-relationship that is just not meant to live happily ever after.